Longing for a state of perfection is wishful thinking. Despite what some people may believe about themselves, everyone, including myself, has flaws. Even though flaws are not characteristics most are proud about, they help create our individual personalities; they are constant obstacles that motivate us to overcome and work towards becoming a better person. If everyone was perfect, there would be no need or motivation to work hard to overcome handicaps.
Recently, I catch myself judging people from what others say about them. Listening to what people gossip about others clouds my perception of the ones being spoken about, which then creates preconceived notions about the person. I create unfair opinions about them based on biased views of others without actually getting to know their true personality. For example, freshman year, I had a class with a teacher who everyone said was extremely sarcastic, mean, picked favorites, and was a hard and biased grader. I was terrified for the last two weeks of summer and through the first few weeks of school; I “knew” that I would already dislike her and her class. However, by the end of the first six weeks, I began to realize that she was actually the opposite of all the descriptions from previous students. While she was a particular grader, she did it to help improve our skills as students. She soon became my favorite teacher that year and I began looking forward for her class. From this and many other instances, I have learned and am trying to work on making my own opinions of others from personal interaction and not making presumptions based on other people’s opinions.
I sometimes also judge people too harshly from first impressions. I make assumptions about people and classify them into various categories in my head from even the slightest interaction. For instance, if someone is mean or rude the first time I interact with them, I automatically create a poor opinion of them without considering other factors; that person could actually be a kind and polite person, but they could just be having a bad day. A prime example is tennis. Sometimes the opponents can be extremely curt and aggravating while on the court, but off the court they are a completely different person. While I mainly only interact with them on the court, I sometimes create extremely low opinions about my opponents which then affect my views of or interactions with them off the court. Along with working on not judging people too harshly from first impressions, I also must begin viewing situations from different perspectives. Before judging people or making assumptions of them based on their actions I am unaccustomed to, I must try to see their intentions from their point of view.
Another one of my major flaws is my tendency to overanalyze things, and when concerned with my actions, this overanalyzation causes me to become frustrated with myself. As any athlete knows, everyday cannot be a good day. Sometimes, your performance will not meet your expectations. My coach pointed out this flaw in my tennis game a little while ago. In tennis, when I begin hitting tennis balls into the net or out, I start over analyzing my swing and my game in general. This overthinking is horrible because instead of being focused on the game at hand, I become consumed with thinking about all of my mistakes, which then leads to even more mistakes, finally leading to frustration. Even when I am playing well one day and then miss a shot, I begin to mentally tear myself apart and bring myself down, causing a downfall in confidence and performance. This flaw of over analyzing situations appears in other aspects of my life apart from tennis. Making “stupid mistakes” on a test, not being able to solve one chemistry problem out of twenty on the homework, or finding hidden or underlying meanings in other people’s texts or actions are just a few examples. This over analyzation just creates unnecessary stress in my life. One of my teachers last year always told me there are two rules in life. One, don’t sweat the small stuff. Two, everything’s small stuff. While I do not entirely agree with the second rule, I need to begin working on not sweating the trivial aspects of life and instead look at them in the big scheme of things and realize they really are just what they are: trivial.
I am clearly not perfect. While I am a perfectionist and strive to be perfect, I will always have flaws. My flaws are not aspects I am particularly proud about, but they are obstacles that motivate me to work hard to overcome, and recognizing them has brought me one step closer to correcting them.